Dear Mom,

I know it's almost 4am my time, but I can't sleep. I also know that you're not feeling well, and I hate to bug you, but...

I'm coming home in aproximately five days and I just had a couple of requests.

Will you still buy me the latest "Real Simple" magazine? I missed out on November's issue, but December's is even more enticing!

And will you sponsor a hair cut for me? It keeps growing and growing and not in a good way. I can hardly take it anymore. Plus, shorter hair will look cuter under a wintery hat.

Finally, could you maybe set off a bug bomb in my "cottage" before I get back? Please?

Think about it. Feel better. Respond promptly.

Love,
Me